Dear Ethan,
You were born and you changed me forever. The minute I became your mother I wanted nothing else than to care for you. I knew what I was supposed to do. I was happy doing it. I was more than happy, for the first time I felt like I was doing something with myself. You gave me purpose. The momma bear instinct kicked in with full force.
I love how you are so active. You definitely keep us on our toes. Ever since you learned to crawl you have been on the move. You love to run, bike, walk, swim, explore and I love that part of you. I crack up when I see you walking around the house with all your pads and helmet on. I remember that you used to run back and forth between the couch and the sliding door, like you were doing sprints or something. You have always loved the beach, running right into the water no matter the time of year. Last summer I watched you swim in the pool with your arm floaties and you were so proud. I wish I had your energy.
I love your imagination. You do a good monster face. You have walked up to kids at the park and growled at them because you wanted to play monster with them. I had to talk to you about how that might not be the best first impression you could make. You love to play pirate in the backyard or wear your Superman cape and run around pretending you are saving the world from the next evil doer. You have always loved to paint. I love hearing you tell me what your pictures mean. Now that you are in preschool you bring home so many art pieces, they are my favorite. I can see your mind at work. You are so intelligent.
I love your smile. I love your gentle nature. When you were a baby you used to rub my arm when I was holding you and I loved that. You are my first child which means you have had to be the pioneer and experience things first. Sometimes you jump right in and do it. Other times you cling to my leg and need a little push. I know what its like being the oldest. Sometimes I wish I could take that away from you so you wouldn't have to experience everything first. But I've seen that you are the best suited for it. I can see how your younger brother looks up to you and you are a good example. Your dad and I can explain something to you then let you choose and you, generally, choose the best option. You are even tempered. When Luke is upset you like to cheer him up. You are full of compliments lately. 
When you were a baby I loved that you loved your pacifier. I thought it was so cute. You would walk around with one in your mouth and one in each hand. You would suck on it upside down or sideways. If you were upset we could just give you your "peta" and you would be happy. Then when you were three you gave it up happily. I was afraid of the fight we were going to have to endure but you didn't put up much of one.
I love how curious you are. Sometimes it drives me crazy but I love it. You love to ask where things come from. If I know the answer I will tell you. If I don't then I tell you I don't know and most of the time you are ok with that. I thought you would inundate me with whys but you don't, or maybe you haven't yet. One of the best parts of being a mom is watching you discover the world around you. I want to keep you from the ugly and hurtful but I hope to give you a strong sense of self that you can face it and see the good in everything. You make the world around you a better place.
I love that you like to eat. Not only eat but you are pretty good at trying new things. A couple nights ago I gave you some steamed green beans with your dinner. As soon as I tasted my own green beans I wanted to remove them from your plate because they were gross but I didn't and you finished them. You have always been a good eater. You have complimented me a couple times at dinnertime and its adorable. I aim to please and its great to be appreciated. I love you for that.
2 Comments:
Camilla, what a great idea!! This will be something for the boys to always look back on.
My memory of ethan is precious..I remember that you were in the hospital and I had to call into my professor at CSULB, and tell him I had a family emergency..I could not miss the birth of my first nephew...then after that I would rush home everyday to visit that cute kid! Then when I had Ellie, I felt as if I had let Ethan down, I couldn't be his "tia" anymore, but I had another responsability to tend too. But now as Ellie and Ethan play, I am grateful for family! Ethan will always be the nurturer...the leader! I think it has already begun!
love the pic of Ethan in his diaper with the Christmas lights!!! That is such a cool pic!
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