Things are getting ugly around here. Ethan and Luke have learned some different fighting styles. Thankfully the hitting tactic is reserved for REALLY ugly times. It starts with screaming and if that doesn't work then it escalates. The screaming is what has changed. When they get angry we commonly hear "Don't talk to me!!!" Or "I'm going away!!!" or "I'm not your brother anymore!!!!" Doors are being slammed, toys being thrown, harsh words spoken. Yikes. Sometimes I don't interfere. I figure, let them work it out. But, on occasion, I have to step in. Like when the "I'm not your brother anymore" gets thrown out. Or, this hasn't happened as often, when "I hate you" is uttered. That one is not acceptable, I just can't tolerate it. Its completely acceptable to not like someone in the heat of the moment, even REALLY not like them. There were plenty of times I didn't like my sisters. If you ask them they will happily tell you of all the times I pinched them (that was my defense mechanism of choice). But I just can't tolerate the I hate yous or the I'm not your brothers. We are family, darn it, and that just doesn't change....no matter what ugliness we display to each other. Some times I just have to laugh when they fight with each other because I can tell its not about the item they are fighting over but the power struggle. Fun times around the Rasmussen household.....never a dull moment...actually, I could use one of those right now. :)
Thursday, January 8, 2009
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Kelsey and Jacob were pretty good about not fighting (but they were a boy and girl). However, Kelsey constantly pestered Jacob and I told her that one day she would be sorry -- didn't know that day would come when he was about 9 and he finally turned around in line at the movies and socked her as hard as he could. The people around us were mortified at what kind of mother I was because I didn't really say anything to him, just "I told you so" to Kelsey. Little boys just have so much energy but at least they don't hold on to the drama and grudges like my sisters and I did!!!
Sounds familiar, we don't tolerate the I hate you either, luckily they have figured that out and it has only been uttered a couple of times thus far. We're so looking forward to seeing you guys tomorrow!
I feel like a loser of a friend. I thought you had fallen off the face of the earth or being busy with a new baby. My Google Reader seemed to be lacking in posts from you the past few months. My mind isn't what it used to be...maybe it is because I am turning thirty. Anyways, I forgot you had gone private. I had a great time catching up on life around your house for the past few months. I absolutely loved the pictures of the day Sadie was born!! I also laughed at the blast from the past post. Now that I have figured out you haven't really fallen off the face of the earth I will definitely be checking in regularly.
chris and corinne still fight...been going on for years. i'm an only child so it can really get to me!! my sister-in-law shared with us something when her kids were real young. Her two boys started fighting when the 2nd child said to the first, "the holy ghost left our house because we are fighting". then he stopped the arguement. i told that to my kids at the time, but it didn't really make a difference for them...haha.
What do you expect from 2 boys when (perhaps) the 'new baby girl' might get more attention then them periodically?
I never had brothers to pick on, but certainly felt 'left out' at times when my 3 sisters got all of my mom's attention. Mom's are kind of that way at time or another with their daughters.
Anyhow, I'm not criticizing you or questioning your 'raising' tactics...I have seen the results recently from many parents in our area who have more than 3 or 4 kids under 5. We have about 15 - 20families like that in our ward now...we often end up sitting with and or holding those who are 'picking on, hitting or screaming at each other' as a help to the parents in their moments of distress at church. They love that we want to help and offer to do so.
I carry a variety of things in my bag to keep them occupied for a short while until they cool off and can go back to their parents.
Good luck! Boys will be boys though, and power struggles will always be there in some form (hopefully in the minor version).
"Bad street talk or TV talk" is never good in the home. Good for you to nip it in the bud.
Take Care ! Enjoy the islands !
The kids will be fine...they surely will appreciate you more when you return. (Unless Grandma Powers spoils them more than you do while you're gone...) ;-D
Don and Meldee
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